you married television host leah miller, so your personal life is also public. does it feel like you can’t get away?
You know, the other day, Leah and I realized that in six years, we have never spent a span of two months together. We never realized it until the other day. The same thing, you just grow accustomed to where your life is. So that’s another thing I’d like to change too, I’d like to have more time trying to be a person. What am I working so hard for? That’s what I’m trying to figure out. I have this far off goal, I guess, that I’m trying to reach, by never taking a break. But I don’t know what that is? Whether it’s that constant of playing or the constant of writing and that’s the goal to be constantly doing that, I don’t know.
maybe it would be exciting to just try something completely different, maybe mr. green is a music teacher now…
Yesterday we were walking to the bus and I said, “I think I’d like to move to the Yukon for a year and work.” Maybe something like that would give me an appreciation, because I’m feeling at this point, I’m starting to resent it or I’m starting to not enjoy it as much as I used to. It’s like I’m falling out of love with it. And I don’t want that to happen, I don’t want to be the sad successful guy. And I feel like I’m approaching that. I feel like I’m dropping a lot on you, I apologize.
no, don’t apologize. i’ve always enjoyed our conversations. let’s change it up a little bit though, let’s talk about your fashion. do you consider yourself fashionable?
Yeah, I do. I don’t consider myself fashionable in the sense that I want to be up on the latest trends, I consider myself fashionable in the sense that I do like to wear a nice shirt and a good pair of pants that fits me, I love men’s fashion. I think the bulk of the interneting I do is men’s fashion blogs. I shop a lot. I like clothes, I always have. I think now that men’s fashion is at a really great point and it’s a little more accessible then it was, say, when I was growing up. The thing is now, I like to dress like a man, if that makes sense. In the early days of Alexis on Fire, I was dressing like a kid, which is fine. I was wearing tight jeans and t-shirts, dressing like a guy that’s in a band, but now I’m thirty one years old and I’m kinda more inspired by my grandfather more than Motley Crue.
our grandfathers had amazing style.
This renaissance of Men’s fashion and Americana and its history is interesting, if you look back at old photos of the dudes who threw on a pair of Levis or a pair of Red Wings and a work jacket and then they went to work, they looked great.
what does it feel like to be an influencer?
It’s interesting, because I’m definitely influenced by things, I always feel like I’m not worthy to influence people. Like, when I see that someone has a tattoo of my lyrics, I’m always like, “Fuck, why did you do that?” but then, I have tattoos of band’s lyrics, but I look at it separately. I don’t understand why someone would get what I wrote. I completely understand getting something that someone wrote, because I have that, but…
where do you get faith in yourself then?
I don’t. I look for it. You know, that’s what I write about, I try and write to help me with things like that. I’m constantly unsatisfied, it’s not the happiest way to live, but it keeps me the way I am. And I would rather be unsatisfied and humble, then satisfied and a prick. And I think there’s just so many people that deserve it and feel like they are owed that fame, but I don’t. I appreciate it more than I feel like I deserve it. Leah is the same way. We both come from nothing too, which I think helps. We’ve earned what we have accomplished and it helps that we found each other and we’re both the same. I get home from tour and we sit on our couch and we watch our shows. It helps having someone who doesn’t give a shit who you are, you know? Leah doesn’t care that I’m a musician that play big rooms like this one, she cares more about the person that I am that she knows. Like I tell her, I’d rather her not wear any makeup, she doesn’t have to wear make up and wear high heels to make me like her.
so you seem to be at a pinnacle in your career and life. is there something that you think you could have done differently ten years ago, something that would have liked to tell yourself?
No, I don’t think so. Obviously I could say, don’t grow your bangs out long, maybe don’t tattoo your hands and don’t wear that pink shirt. But that’s all a way to get to where you wanna be. My mom has a photo of the day I got my first haircut and it was the same haircut I have now. Short on the side, a little bit up top and I was like, that’s how I started and I’m probably going to finish life with this haircut, but in between, I’ve gone through so many different levels, but you have to go through all those things. I think by going through this ten years of straight work and back and forth and figuring out that I really just want to be here, and now getting to a point where I need to start getting to a point where I appreciate it, because I’m either going to become something I hate by turning into that guy that we were just talking about, or I’m going to walk away from it forever. Which I also don’t want to do. I think too, that if I go away for a certain amount of time, people aren’t going to be there when I get back. But I’m starting to realize that most of the people that like my music, like it for the right reasons and they’ll stick with me and wait for me to come back.
i feel like you’re a musician of the people, that when you’re on stage, it feels like you’re just our friend singing songs.
Yeah, I think I am. There’s definitely, nowadays, some people who are here because they heard one song on the radio, or they heard it was the cool thing to do, but I think that 90% of the people that come to these shows are here for the songs, you know? At least that’s what I hope.
if I can just weigh in, i think this is an exciting time for you because for the first time in ten years, you don’t know what’s next.
I’ve attained way more than I ever thought I could. There’s people who grew up wanting to be the biggest and the best and never get there. But all I ever wanted to do was play my songs for some people and I’ve done that over and over. And I’ve reached a point where I never thought I could, and I think that’s the problem too, I don’t know what I’m looking for, so I have to figure it out.
i bet you will.
I think I will. I’ll figure it out.